Top 5 Mistakes to Avoid During Your Divorce Process
Divorce is rarely an easy journey, and the decisions you make during the divorce process can have a lasting impact on your future. If you are going through a divorce process in Texas or considering initiating one, it’s crucial to arm yourself with the correct information from the very beginning. In this comprehensive article (with over 2,700 words of in-depth discussion), we will guide you through the top five mistakes to avoid, provide you with a step-by-step understanding of the divorce process in Texas, and address some of the most frequently asked questions we receive at our law office.
Table of Contents
Understanding the Divorce Process in Texas
Mistake #1: Underestimating the Importance of Legal Counsel
Mistake #2: Failing to Prioritize Financial Preparation
Mistake #3: Letting Emotions Dictate Your Decisions
Mistake #4: Overlooking Child Custody and Co-Parenting Plans
Mistake #5: Attempting to Hide Assets or Withhold Information
Top 5 Questions About the Divorce Process in Texas
Conclusion and Strong Call to Action
Understanding the Divorce Process in Texas
If you reside in Texas and are considering filing for divorce, it’s essential to have at least a basic understanding of how this process works in the Lone Star State. While every couple’s situation is unique, there are standard procedures that generally apply.
1. Residency Requirements
In Texas, either you or your spouse must have lived in the state for at least six months before filing for divorce. Additionally, you or your spouse must have lived in the county where you plan to file for at least 90 days. These residency requirements ensure that the courts have jurisdiction over your case.
2. Grounds for Divorce
Texas is a “no-fault” divorce state, meaning you don’t have to prove wrongdoing by your spouse (such as adultery, cruelty, or abandonment) to get a divorce. Most couples in Texas file under the “insupportability” ground, which essentially means the marriage cannot be saved due to conflict or discord. However, fault grounds like adultery or cruelty can still be alleged and may impact property division or spousal support if proven.
3. Filing the Petition
To initiate the divorce process in Texas, one spouse (the petitioner) must file an Original Petition for Divorce. This document outlines the basic facts of the marriage, identifies the parties and any children, and states the grounds for divorce.
4. Serving the Petition
Once the petition is filed, the other spouse (the respondent) must be served with legal notice of the divorce action. In Texas, this is typically done by a process server, constable, or sheriff. In some situations, service by publication or posting may be allowed if the spouse cannot be located.
5. Temporary Orders
Divorces can take a while to finalize, especially when disputes arise. To maintain order and clarity while the divorce is pending, you or your spouse may request Temporary Orders. These orders can address immediate concerns, such as who remains in the marital home, financial support, child custody, and visitation schedules.
6. Discovery and Negotiations
Discovery is a formal process in which each party obtains information about the other’s finances, assets, liabilities, and more. This stage is critical to determining how property and debts will be divided and whether spousal support is appropriate. Negotiations or mediation sessions often occur during this period to try to reach an agreement before going to trial.
7. Final Decree of Divorce
If you and your spouse can agree on the significant issues, you can present a final settlement to the judge for approval. If you can’t reach an agreement, you will proceed to trial, where the judge decides all contested matters. Once the judge signs the Final Decree of Divorce, your marriage is officially dissolved.
Mistake #1: Underestimating the Importance of Legal Counsel
One of the most significant errors people make during the divorce process in Texas is attempting to navigate the legal system without adequate legal representation. While a “do-it-yourself” divorce might seem like a cost-saving approach initially, it can backfire tremendously if:
You have significant assets or complex financial structures.
There are minor children involved, and child custody becomes contentious.
You are uncertain about the long-term implications of spousal support or property division.
Why You Need an Attorney
Legal Guidance: A qualified divorce attorney in Texas can help you understand your rights and obligations under Texas family law. They will explain how community property (assets acquired during the marriage) and separate property (assets acquired before marriage or through inheritance/gift) should be handled.
Negotiation and Mediation: Emotions tend to run high in divorce proceedings. An attorney can serve as your advocate at the negotiation table, seeking a fair outcome while minimizing conflict.
Protection from Mistakes: Minor clerical or procedural errors can lead to delayed proceedings or an unfair final decree. An experienced lawyer ensures the correct documents are filed timely and accurately.
Cost-Effective in the Long Run: Hiring an attorney might appear expensive in the short term, but making avoidable mistakes can cost you significantly more over time.
Key Takeaway: Don’t underestimate the value of hiring a knowledgeable divorce lawyer who is familiar with Texas law and local court processes.
Mistake #2: Failing to Prioritize Financial Preparation
Divorce is not only an emotional process; it’s also a critical financial event. Mistakes made in handling finances during a divorce can haunt you for years. Whether it’s overlooking a shared debt or neglecting to factor in future expenses, lack of financial preparedness is a common—and costly—pitfall.
A. Organizing Financial Documents
When initiating the divorce process in Texas, it’s imperative to gather comprehensive financial documentation. This includes:
Bank Statements: Checking, savings, money market accounts, and certificates of deposit (CDs).
Real Estate Documents: Mortgage statements, deeds, property tax records.
Credit Card Statements: A record of ongoing liabilities and spending.
Insurance Policies: Life, health, homeowner’s, auto, and any other policy with cash value.
Tax Returns: Typically, the last three to five years of personal and business tax returns (if applicable).
Having all these documents ready makes it easier to work with your attorney to identify marital and separate property, properly assess debts, and ensure equitable division.
B. Understanding Community vs. Separate Property
In Texas, the default assumption is that all property acquired during the marriage is community property, which is subject to a just and right division. However, certain assets may qualify as separate property if you owned them before marriage or if they were given to you as a gift or inheritance. Failing to understand the difference between community and separate property can result in unfair settlements and future legal disputes.
C. Budgeting for Post-Divorce Life
Another critical financial aspect that people often overlook is creating a realistic post-divorce budget. When your household splits into two, your living expenses often increase, and your household income may decrease. Consider the following:
Housing expenses (rent, mortgage, utilities)
Groceries and household necessities
Health insurance, auto insurance, and life insurance
Educational expenses for children
Debt payments
Don’t forget potential spousal support (alimony) obligations or child support payments. Putting together a well-planned budget before finalizing your divorce can help you set realistic expectations and avoid financial pitfalls.
D. Seeking Professional Financial Advice
Consider consulting a financial planner or accountant to help you navigate the complexities of dividing assets and liabilities. They can assist you in forecasting the long-term economic impact of various settlement scenarios, ensuring you don’t walk away with a deal you’ll regret.
Key Takeaway: Proactive financial organization and planning are indispensable for achieving a fair and sustainable settlement in a Texas divorce.
Mistake #3: Letting Emotions Dictate Your Decisions
It’s perfectly normal to experience intense emotions during a divorce—anger, sadness, regret, or even relief. However, allowing these emotions to control your decision-making can undermine your case and lead to outcomes that don’t serve your best interests.
A. Emotional vs. Rational Thinking
Emotional responses during divorce can manifest in various ways:
Vindictive Behavior: Pursuing unnecessary legal battles out of anger or a desire for revenge can drain your finances and prolong the divorce process.
Impulsive Decisions: Hastily agreeing to disadvantageous settlements to “get it over with” can harm you financially and personally in the long run.
Try to approach major decisions—like division of assets, custody arrangements, and spousal support—in a level-headed manner. An attorney or mediator can help you see the bigger picture beyond your immediate emotional distress.
B. The Role of Therapy and Counseling
During the divorce process in Texas, it’s often wise to seek emotional support from a qualified therapist or counselor. This professional guidance can help you healthily process your feelings and keep your focus on the practical elements of the divorce. Some benefits of therapy during divorce:
Stress Management: Techniques to cope with anxiety, depression, and anger.
Co-Parenting Strategies: If you have children, counseling can offer tools to establish a healthy co-parenting relationship.
Improved Communication: Guidance on communicating effectively with your ex-spouse to avoid escalating conflicts.
C. Protecting Children from Emotional Fallout
If you have children, they can be profoundly affected by their parents’ divorce. Strive to keep them out of parental disputes and avoid using them as messengers or pawns. Children fare best when parents maintain a united front in matters involving their well-being, even if your marriage is ending.
Key Takeaway: Keep your emotions in check during critical moments of the divorce process. Seek professional help if necessary, and focus on rational decision-making for better long-term outcomes.
Mistake #4: Overlooking Child Custody and Co-Parenting Plans
Texas courts prioritize the “best interest of the child” when deciding custody and visitation matters. Mistakes in handling child custody can have far-reaching consequences, both emotionally and legally. If you don’t diligently address your child’s needs and your parental responsibilities, you may end up with less favorable custody arrangements.
A. Types of Custody in Texas
Texas family law recognizes two main types of conservatorship (custody):
Joint Managing Conservatorship (JMC): In most cases, the court prefers to appoint both parents as joint managing conservators, sharing the rights and responsibilities of raising the child. However, physical possession and access schedules can vary, and one parent may still be awarded primary residence.
Sole Managing Conservatorship (SMC): In cases where one parent is deemed unfit or poses a danger to the child, the court may grant the other parent sole managing conservatorship. This parent has the exclusive right to make significant decisions about the child’s education, healthcare, and other major issues.
B. Creating a Detailed Parenting Plan
A comprehensive parenting plan is a blueprint for how you and your ex-spouse will co-parent after the divorce. It should address:
Custody Arrangements: Who has the right to determine the child’s primary residence and the visitation schedule?
Decision-Making Authority: Which parent makes educational, medical, and religious decisions, or whether these decisions are shared?
Holiday and Vacation Schedules: How you’ll split holidays, extended breaks, and vacations.
Transportation and Handoffs: Logistics of picking up and dropping off children.
Communication Methods: How parents will communicate about the child’s needs (via email, co-parenting apps, phone calls).
Texas courts often require parents to attend a co-parenting class, which can help them put together a workable plan.
C. Child Support Considerations
In Texas, child support is typically calculated based on the noncustodial parent’s net resources and the number of children to be supported. Make sure you have accurate financial information for calculating child support obligations. Missing or incorrectly reporting financial data could result in an inaccurate child support order—either too high or too low.
D. Modifications
One positive aspect of Texas family law is that child custody and support orders can be modified if circumstances substantially change. However, seeking a modification can be time-consuming and costly, so it’s best to negotiate a fair and workable arrangement from the onset.
Key Takeaway: Child custody and co-parenting plans are pivotal in Texas divorces. Approach them with the child’s best interest at heart and draft a detailed parenting plan to minimize future disputes.
Mistake #5: Attempting to Hide Assets or Withhold Information
Divorce often involves significant financial scrutiny. A common misconception is that one can outsmart the process by hiding assets, lying about income, or concealing debts. Not only is this unethical, but it can also lead to severe legal consequences.
A. Consequences of Concealing Assets
If you are discovered hiding assets, the court may:
Award a Larger Share to the Other Spouse: Judges don’t look kindly on dishonest behavior, and they may penalize you by awarding a more significant portion of the hidden assets—or other marital assets—to your spouse.
Impose Sanctions and Penalties: If you lie under oath or falsify documents, you could face fines, sanctions, and even criminal charges for perjury or fraud.
B. Full Disclosure is Essential
Texas law mandates full disclosure of assets, liabilities, and financial records during divorce proceedings. Being transparent is in your best interest, as it gives you credibility in the eyes of the court and can lead to more equitable negotiations.
C. Methods of Finding Hidden Assets
Legal discovery tools, including depositions, subpoenas, and forensic accountants, can uncover hidden or underreported income. Modern technology also makes tracing digital footprints easier than ever before. Ultimately, it’s not worth the risk to try to hide assets.
Key Takeaway: Always be honest and forthcoming about your financial situation to avoid jeopardizing your case and your future financial security.
Top 5 Questions About the Divorce Process in Texas
Below are five commonly asked questions that we receive about the divorce process in Texas. Each question is addressed in detail to help clarify some of the most pressing concerns you may have during this challenging time.
1. How Long Does a Divorce Process in Texas Take?
Under Texas law, there is a mandatory 60-day “cooling-off” period after you file the Original Petition for Divorce. This means your divorce cannot be finalized until at least 60 days have passed. However, more complex cases—especially those involving contested custody or extensive assets—can take much longer, sometimes up to a year or more. Factors that extend the timeline include:
Ongoing disputes about property division, spousal support, or child custody
Busy court dockets
Scheduling conflicts for depositions, mediations, or trials
2. Is Mediation Required?
Many Texas courts require mediation in contested cases, as it encourages settlement and reduces the burden on the court system. Even if not mandated, mediation is often a wise choice because it can save you time, money, and emotional stress. During mediation, a neutral third party (the mediator) helps you and your spouse negotiate disputed issues to reach a mutually acceptable solution.
3. Can I Get Spousal Support (Alimony) in Texas?
Spousal support, often called “alimony,” is not automatically granted in Texas. The court will consider factors like the length of the marriage, each spouse’s education and employment skills, and whether there are instances of domestic violence. Typically, spousal maintenance is awarded only if:
The marriage lasted 10 years or more, and
One spouse is unable to earn enough income to meet basic needs.
Temporary spousal support may also be awarded during the divorce process to maintain the status quo until the final decree is entered.
4. What is a “No-Fault” Divorce and Does Fault Matter?
In a “no-fault” divorce, you claim “insupportability” as grounds for dissolving the marriage. This means neither spouse has to prove wrongdoing. However, fault can still matter in some instances—like proving adultery or cruelty—because a judge might award a more significant portion of the marital estate to the wronged spouse if the fault is proven.
5. Do I Really Need a Lawyer if My Divorce Seems Simple?
It’s highly advisable to at least consult with a divorce attorney. Even seemingly straightforward divorces can involve legal nuances, especially regarding property division or parental responsibilities. An attorney can review any proposed settlement, ensure all legal documents are in order, and safeguard your rights throughout the process. Attempting to handle a divorce entirely on your own can be risky if unexpected disagreements or issues surface.
Additional Tips for Navigating the Divorce Process in Texas
While avoiding the top five mistakes is crucial, here are a few additional tips to help you successfully navigate your divorce:
1. Keep Lines of Communication Open (If Possible)
Hostile communication strains emotional well-being and can affect settlement negotiations. If your relationship with your spouse is amicable enough, try to maintain respectful communication, especially regarding your children’s schedules, financial matters, or logistical coordination.
2. Stay Off Social Media or Be Extremely Cautious
Social media posts can be used against you in court. Even an innocent photo or status update can be misinterpreted. It’s generally wise to limit your social media activity or switch your accounts to private settings. Discuss with your attorney what is and isn’t appropriate to post while your divorce is ongoing.
3. Follow Temporary Orders Strictly
If the court issues Temporary Orders about child support, possession schedules, or spousal support, follow them scrupulously. Failing to comply can damage your credibility and harm your chances of a favorable outcome.
4. Document Everything
Keep a detailed record of critical communications, expenses, and events. This documentation can be invaluable if disputes arise about who paid for what or if your ex-spouse violates court orders.
5. Consider the Long-Term Consequences
Every choice you make—be it about custody arrangements, property division, or spousal support—can affect your life for years to come. Work with your attorney and possibly a financial advisor to weigh the long-term implications before signing any agreement.
Conclusion and Strong Call to Action
Divorce is a pivotal life event that often brings significant legal, financial, and emotional challenges. By avoiding the top five mistakes—failing to secure proper legal counsel, neglecting financial preparation, allowing emotions to dictate decisions, overlooking child custody and co-parenting arrangements, and attempting to hide assets—you can set yourself up for a smoother, more equitable divorce process in Texas.
If you are contemplating a divorce, already in the midst of one, or need guidance post-divorce, we encourage you to reach out to The Law Office of Bobbie Young. Our experienced legal team is dedicated to providing compassionate, personalized, and results-driven representation. We understand the complexities of the Texas family law system, and we are here to help you navigate each step with confidence.
Ready to protect your rights and secure a bright future for yourself and your family?
Contact us today to schedule your consultation. Let us put our years of experience in Texas divorce law to work for you so that you can focus on what truly matters—building a fresh start for the next chapter of your life.
Your Legal Solution Starts Here
Clear, practical legal advice you can count on when it matters most
